Thursday, July 30, 2009

Soul crushing moment today.....

I had to have a chest x-ray today because of the funky feeling I had in my chest a couple weeks ago, which I still swear is just stress related. Anyways, they give me a gown to put on, and then a robe over it...both were extremely tight across the chest and arms! So I had the x-rays and then went to change and I couldn't get out of them....I started to panic as embarrassment washed over me...wondering would I have to call that male x-ray technician over to help me...with the gown going one way and the robe the other way, and both being tight, it was like being in a straight-jacket. I yanked and pulled and tried to get my arms back but it was so tight I could only move so much...and the panic set in...and I was on the verge of tears....beads of sweat running down my face...it was at that very moment that I was reminded exactly what I am pursuing the surgery! I can't begin to explain how soul crushing...hot utterly embarrassing something like this....when a normal, ole hospital gown is so tight that you struggle for 10 minutes to get it off. I don't know how it finally came off, honestly I don't! I can't believe I am actually sharing this publicly ...admitting this is so hard, but I feel like if I am going to do this, I might as well share the good and bad along the way!

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