Friday, October 9, 2009

Caught blindsided!

Yesterday morning I was washing breakfast dishes and Trevor came up to me and said, "mom, why do some kids have two mommies?"

For a moment, if felt like the wind had been knocked out of my sails. Now don't get me wrong, I honestly don't mind the question itself, I just didn't imagine he'd ask me it at 5.5 yrs old!

Immediately my mind went to one place....SCHOOL. See, here in Maine there is a question in the upcoming elections about gay marriage and there are all these commercials from both sides ...but the ones that get me are the commercials from the opposition about how if we allow this they will teach our children homosexuality in school. I despise the idea that any teacher would allow themselves to participate in these commercials, no matter what side they take. I think teachers need to keep their political beliefs to themselves.

Now, I know it's been years since I was in school, but I was never taught about straight marriage, so why would we suddenly start teaching about gay marriage simply because the law allows gays and lesbians to marry?

I will say once again, I support gay marriage. Allowing two people of the same sex to marry doesn't change my marriage - for those who say that it affects their marriage, well then I say you have much bigger problems and don't have a great marriage to begin with. When my neighbors, heterosexuals, got married, it didn't change anything, and neither will allowing gays to marry.

Anyways, so I asked Trevor where he heard this and he pointed across the street where two women were waiting for the school bus with two small children. Whether they are gay or not, I haven't a clue...we just moved here. So I explained to Trevor that they might just be friends, they might be sisters, roommates, neighbors. And then I explained to him that sometimes women fall in love with other women the way I love daddy. And that sometimes men fall in love with other men, just like how daddy loves me. And I left it at that!

And for now, he was ok with that answer. He didn't pursue it anymore. I think I handled it ok, especially since I didn't have any time to really think about a good answer. I know it goes against everything I was ever taught growing up....and goes against pretty much everything my family continues to believe, but my heart will not allow me to discriminate against two people simply based on their sexual preferences. I can't predict my childrens future...I have no crystal ball that will allow me to see what my children grow up to be....but I can't in good conscience be intolerant of gays and lesbians when I have no idea of what my children may be. I don't want my kids to grow up having heard me make fun of gays and lesbians and discriminating against them in the event that one of them is gay. I want my children to grow up knowing a mom who is full of love and acceptance.

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