Thursday, February 4, 2010

Encouraging ....

I forgot to mention in my post yesterday that in the midst of everything else, there was an incident at school the same day everything took place. In talking to everyone at the meeting today, we determined that Trevor doesn't know how to talk about this stuff, so he "shows" it by his actions, and that was of course, fighting and running off.

What was the incident?

Well, Tuesday morning we received a call from the principal of Trevor's school. She said that some staff overheard another little boy tell Trevor that he was going to bring a knife to school the next day and stab him in the head and kill him.

I won't lie - my immediate reaction was one of relief that it was *not* Trevor making those kinds of threats. While Trevor may spout off at us and wish us dead and tell us he hates us, I couldn't handle knowing that his anger and hurtful words had been turned towards other children.

The principal assured us that the other child had been disciplined and his parents were called, etc.

I left it at that - I didn't question anymore or demand anything more come of it. Maybe that wasn't the right way to handle it, but being the first time we've ever had to deal with anything like this, I felt this was the right way to go about it right now.

Now, on to today....

We had a meeting today with one of the staff members from the crisis unit, his case mgr, and one of the providers of a service he'll be getting. I think it was a great meeting and went well. We discussed where we were with all the services we are going to be getting. Let's see ....

Section 24 - this from how I understand it, will be someone coming in to the home or taking Trevor out in the community to work with him on different issues - for example, safety while outside. They'll be able to take him to different places and work on this. We've been awarded 12 hours a week to start - 3 days for 4 hours a day. I think this is really going to be a huge help for Trevor.

65M or 65HCT - and this from my understanding is family/ group therapy. Someone will come in the home to work with all of us on the different issues - again, for example the safety. At this point I am unsure of how many hours a week we will have this service, but it's in place and just a matter of getting started. The agency that will be providing this service, also runs a horse ranch. We are hoping to get Trevor involved in their program where he'd be working with the horses - a bit of animal therapy if you will.

OT - this will likely start in March or April just based on openings as it stands right now. This will be to work with Trevor on his sensory issues.

Respite - we are on the waiting list - right now it will most likely be April when the next quarter starts.

We talked about how my family openly favors Victoria and what that must be doing to Trevor and how he picks up on it. It was suggested I include the extended family into the family therapy so they can hear for themselves how this is affecting Trevor. If they can't treat Trevor the same as they treat Trevor, then they won't be able to see either one basically. He's a smart kid and when you ignore him and go ga-ga over Victoria, it's incredibly obvious.

As for Trevor, he's doing well. He doesn't like to talk about why he gets angry or his emotions but they are working on that. He's doing good working on following the rules. I think we will implement some of them here at home.

As it stands now, he'll be there till Monday. I know he needs this and it also gives us a much needed break and the ability to breathe a sigh of relief knowing he's with people who are specially trained to take care of kids like him....but it's hard still. This is his first time away from home and the first time I've been away from him this long and it's incredibly difficult. The only time he and I have been apart is when I went into the hospital to have Victoria and despite a c/section I begged to go home early because I missed him like crazy.

We brought him some birthday/Valentine's cards that had come in the mail yesterday and he was so thrilled. He stood them up on his desk - I think it made him feel good and like a bit of home was with him.

It was good to hear them tell us today how smart he is and how well mannered he is. Despite everything we go through, it's encouraging to hear that I've done something right. I've been doing this parenting thing for almost 6 yrs now and I still wonder when I'll stop second guessing myself?

We spent close to an hour again with Trevor - it was so nice to see him and just be able to enjoy each other.

He had a visit today from the pastor of the church he goes to with my family. I guess he spent about 45 minutes with Trevor and that totally made Trevor's day. He thinks Pastor in the best. Pastor brought him a Spongebob coloring book, crayons and a Rice Krispie Treat bar. Trevor kept talking about this tonight on the phone! LOL!! I am so grateful for him going to visit with Trevor. You know I am not religious in the least - I have my beliefs and such - but I don't agree for lack of better word, with mainstream religion, and I liked the fact that despite the fact that we don't attend this church, that the pastor took the time to go visit Trevor. It's a testament to his dedication to his congregation I think.

Well, time for this mama to work on laundry....more to come later!


1 comment:

  1. Erin, do you realize you sound like a different person today? I'm so happy for you and for Trevor's progress. I've cried sad tears for you this week, but right now I'm crying happy tears. Hugs.

    (Sending Valentines tomorrow!)